What the FUCK was she thinking?

So, this morning (around 18 hours ago), I turn on my PC and start up Thunderbird.

The first message I get, is that someone wants to befriend me at Facebook.
I blink, slightly confused, and read on.

I read her name.

I stare.
I blink.
I stare some more.

It was my first girlfriend.

The damn[list of expletives] who nearly destroyed me 7 years ago. We parted on a "high note" which involved her trying to kick me in my private parts while shouting "because of you I will never love again!" in a public area. ... When SHE was the one who broke it off in the first place. (That outbreak came two days later, when she asked me if we could try it one more time and I more or less told her to fuck off and never come again.)

I shredded/threw away everything that reminded me of my year with her. I mended all the emotional scars. I thanked my then closest friends for pulling me out of there back then profoundly. I initiated a scorched-earth policy, and I let her know that without her my life got better, way better, for me. That "losing" her was the best thing that ever happened to me (Not entirely true. Two weeks after the break up I met the girl who would be my second girlfriend a few weeks later. And that was one of the best times in my life.)

And now, out of the blue, she wants to befriend me at Facebook.

I immediately clicked "ignore" and I will neither write her nor read/acknowledge any of her messages, because I really don't need the drama right now. Or ever again.


But... *argh* The sheer guts she must posses to want to take up contact again.


She was one of the very few humans alive I ever wished fiery death upon. I chilled down considerably, but my first reaction to reading or hearing her name is still a sneer and an involuntary shake of my head.

...

What the FUCK was she thinking?